Sunday, January 31, 2010

The Candy Bandit

So, a little before Christmas we had a Cookies and Cocktails party at my house. Afterwards, there were TONS of cookies and candy left over. I packaged up the cookies and took them to the neighbors as Christmas happies, gave some of the candy away, and then put the rest, which consisted of red and green peanut M&Ms, a few Reeses peanut butter cups, and some small Krackel and Hershey's kisses and chocolate bars, in one of my favorite little Good Earth pottery bowls that I keep on an end table in our living room.

Since Christmas, the candy has been slowly dwindling. I wasn't eating it often--maybe a few M&M's one day a week, or one Krackel bar a week or something. And I was extremely proud of myself, mind you, for resisting the call of the chocolate! I viewed it as an exercise in willpower. Thus, I figured that Taylor had been giving in to the sweet tooth--especially when I saw that the Reeses were the first to go--those are his favorite.

So this morning I had to be at church really early for a sound check because I am on the praise team this month. I decided that I wouldn't make Sleeping Beauty (aka Taylor) miss any of his beauty rest, so he was just going to bring his own car to church at the normal time, and meet me there. As I was leaving the house, I looked down in the candy bowl and noticed that ALL the M&Ms were gone, leaving about six Hershey's kisses and five or so little chocolate bars. And thus I thought to myself, dang, Taylor must have really had a sweet craving yesterday!

Fast forward a couple of hours. When we get back from church, I pass by the bowl again and notice that it is EMPTY. So I thought, ok, I've gotta call him out, he's taking all the chocolate! I went back to our bedroom where he was and asked, "Taylor did you eat all the rest of the chocolate in that little pottery bowl this morning?"

"Um...what are you talking about?"

"You know, that little Good Earth bowl on the end table in the living room that had chocolate in it."

"I haven't eaten anything out of that bowl since before Christmas."

"Very funny."

"No, seriously. I swear. I thought you had been eating it."

I proceed to proclaim my certainty that there is a burglar hiding in one of our closets. Poor Taylor, familiar as he is with this, my particular choice ritual of insanity, walks around the entire house with me, checking closets (I checked under the beds too) to make sure Mr. Boogey Man had left the premises.

Once the burglar theory had been debunked, the answer was obvious.

There is a ghost in my house. Probably some poor teenage girl whose mother forced her to never eat chocolate, always be on a diet, and who is forever scarred and deprived, doomed to steal other people's chocolate forever and never have real satisfaction or rest.

Ok so maybe not. Rewind.

Once the burgler theory had been debunked, the answer was obvious. And here it is:

Oh sure, they look innocent. But innocent they are NOT! And truly, I think the real culprit is the little one. He's a bit mischevious. Wouldn't surprise me a bit.

In all seriousness though, I was pretty worried. Especially if Teddy had eaten it all by himself--he is a little guy--around 10 lbs, and I know that any chocolate at all is bad for them. We called the 24 hr emergency animal clinic, and they said that unless he starts exhibiting signs of illness or upset stomach, he should be fine.

Still though, I learned my lesson! No more candy left out in bowls around the house!

I think the funniest part about all this is that they A) they were very dainty about everything--they didn't knock the bowl, which is pretty small, off the table into a thousand pieces and B)they didn't eat it all at once! They just had a little sweet snack every day!

I think I've found my new calling--as a detective. Call me with any of your unsolved mysteries! :)


  1. hahhaha, Ted looks so innocent in that picture. He is even crossing his paws like "who, me!?" love, cg

  2. okay, here's my question though: what did they do with the wrappers??